Acting on a Thursday When I Refuse to Shine
- Pilar Uribe
- 4 hours ago
- 4 min read
I spend an ordinary day practicing acting without the spotlight: listening, observing, and collecting behavior wherever I can find it. By the time I crawl into bed, even my bad mood has turned into usable material.
How a Stolen T-Shirt Became a Motto
During my junior year in college, I was so incensed upon finding my favorite sweater in one of my roommates' drawers that I took her tee shirt lying underneath. On the front it read, "I may rise but I refuse to shine." I loved wearing it when I was in a mood. She never said a word and I wore that shirt until it fell apart a few years later.
That's how I feel on this particular Thursday morning; refusing to shine. It's been three weeks since I came back from the East Coast and my body is still waking up in the dark, three hours early. This makes me grumpy. I just finished dreaming of a devil's head on a stick singing, My phone alarm rings in the next room. This makes me even grumpier. I get back in bed and cuddle a few extra minutes with Paco, who is hogging the bed under the covers. Time to read a little from my current book, do my affirmations, morning exercises, get breakfast for both of us and work.
My passion is acting. Whether I'm recording auditions in my VoiceOver booth, at a studio session or studying for an acting class, I'm always refining my craft. Lately I've become more aware of two important components of this profession: listening and observing.
Acting from the Corner Seat
Writing in cafes is the easiest way to do this. After an early morning swim, I go to one of my favorite haunts expecting it to be empty, but it's full of people. There's a very important sounding student with a laptop, tablet, and speaking into her phone. She is hogging three spaces. "Can I get a little room? I'd really appreciate it," I variythis question a few times until she finally grants me the corner. I go up to a young woman wearing braids at a neighboring table.
"Can I use your chair? It's the only one that has a back."
"There's someone coming," she answers. I shrug my shoulders, grab a nearby stool and open my laptop. I can't help but hear all the different conversations wafting through this tiny, hip establishment.
"San Diego is seven hours away." (really?)
"46 order is ready."
"The environmental ones are much faster."
"I'll text it to you today."
"Is that number right? I got something different."
Students are eating, talking, drinking coffee, studying and concentrating. I'm not interested in the actual conversation. What I hear is all kinds of different speech patterns: fast, slow, interrupting, hesitating, stuttering. What isn't being said? What is underneath the words?
Then there's the behavior: how they sit, stand, hesitate, and wait for approval from their friends. t's fascinating. Was I like this when I was younger? Doesn't matter. Their behaviors are ones I can use when I'm working on a character.
Space hogger girl gets up and I ask to use her chair. I slide over my laptop, thankful there's more room here. A hulking guy takes my stool in the corner. Now I have a different angle. Whereas before I was looking at the back of a refrigerator, now I can see two women admiring the potted plants outside Trader Joe's.
Two hours later, my back has had enough of sitting. I think of braid woman. I am tempted to pass her with a snide remark as I leave for not sharing the extra seat with me. I sense a change in volume in the cramped cafe. I turn around. Braid woman's friend has arrived and is sitting in the chair. I am glad I kept my mouth shut. I breathe in relief and exhale snarky.
The Unromantic Side of Acting
I go home. I practice my acting homework. I have a deadline to read five books before June. I'm behind because I'm reading a book that was recommended but doesn't inspire me to continue. And I have a whole bunch of movies and tv series to watch before voting closes for the Actor awards (why they didn't keep the name SAG-AFTRA awards is a mystery).
I also check on the business side as I prepare to do my taxes. It's not something I love doing. but it's necessary. I am my own one woman small business bandstand, after all.
Many years ago, when I was between corporate jobs, I took the Johnson O'Connor tests. After a two-day evaluation, I was told "You'll make a great actress." I'll never forget when the moderator drew a circle, dividing it into two.
"The big side," he said pointing, "is for the finance, construction, education, transportation side of how we live. Everything to do with business. The smaller piece of the pie is for actors, painters, musicians, writers, everything to do with the arts. Here's what people don't understand. The little piece of the pie can't live without the big piece. But the big piece will not survive without the artists."
Many years ago, when I was between corporate jobs, I took the Johnson O'Connor tests. After a two-day evaluation, I was told "You'll make a great actress."
Taking Inventory
I cook dinner for myself first, making sure to serve Paco before I actually take a bite. Otherwise, I'll never hear the end of it. I review my day. It started at seven am, watching a lifeguard dance a subtle cumbia while I was swimming. It ends at 10pm, with Paco sneakily appearing under the covers and settling himself against my hip. Despite my original refusal to shine, my orneriness allowed me to observe sounds, attitudes, behaviors, and walks. Lots of material to incorporate for a character, whether it's for, a monologue, scene study. or a voiceover session. It's all about acting.